So I've mentioned quite a few times on my previous blog posts that I'm dating. And although I'm normally not the type to get way too personal publicly, I feel that I owe you guys an explanation of why I've been a bit M.I.A (missing in action) for the most part of summer. I know many of you were probably wondering but some have boldly asked. Thought this is the perfect time to tell you a little bit about it.
Well, I started dating my "big bro." But before you think it's an incest, let me just tell you more about it. I've met him 5 years ago and we've became friends since then. We go to the same church, part of the same choir, but we never really met at church. See, we go to Lakewood Church, which has about 400 people in the choir so it's practically impossible to get to know everyone. Our choir had a trip to LA back in April of 2010 I believe and I traveled with a couple of friends of mine, who is common friends with him. We saw him at the airport and since he rented a car, he offered to take us to our hotel which was across the street from theirs anyways. We became a groupie since then with a few other friends. He's 6 years older than I am so I started calling him "Big Bro." The funny thing was that I'm the oldest amongst the other girls in our group but no one really ever called him a big bro, other than myself. We've been friends for the past 5 1/2 years but the closest that we've been was the last 3 years.
We've had each other in a friend box (or big bro-lil sis box) and I never really thought of anything beyond being friends. I was also dating someone when we first became friends. He's an African American and my personal preference was not to date a black guy (No offense. I hope that you will not take this wrongfully.) because of possible cultural differences. Surprisingly, things took a different turn at the beginning of May this year and somehow we started feeling "something" for each other. It didn't quite go there immediately but after several thought-provoking process (mostly on his part since he didn't want to ruin our friendship), he finally got the courage to ask me if I would date him (more non-straight-forward way than this though).
I remember at the beginning of this year, I was still encouraging him to ask out a few different girls and he did. For some reason, it just didn't go anywhere. It's been about 8 years or so I believe since he's been in a relationship and he's not the type to just get into something without carefully considering it.
After the night he asked me, it still took us a few weeks to become officially together. I think it took a lot of effort on his side to go outside the box and initiate the process. After all, it's not easy to get rejected and risk ruining our 5-year long friendship. He knew for a fact that I wouldn't date a black guy but he took the risk and I appreciate it. Things change, I change. My preferences changed, I became more open-minded for which I'm glad I did because I would have missed out on what God is doing in our lives together.
A lot of people have asked…"How do you go from calling each other Big Bro/Lil Sis to being a couple?" I guess because we clicked and knew each other quite well, the transition wasn't too difficult. The challenge was just at the beginning – whether I would go for getting outside our friend box or not. We're totally opposites but I'm glad our personality types are working quite well thus far as a couple.
Can I just tell you how thankful I am that I didn't have to create an online dating profile to find the one? Not that there's anything wrong with it! There have been some success stories from those online dating sites. Speaking of "the one", MTV's Are You The One? Season 3 has officially launched on September 30! Have you seen it yet?
If you've never heard of it, you can check out the first episode of Season 3 here. This reality show is like no other! It's really like an eHarmony.com in real life. You know how these online dating sites use different algorithms and compatibility testings to find your match for you? This is how this dating show works but the results are kept secret until the participants have gotten to know each other personally and have taken several tests. It's very interesting and I really see it as an eHarmony.com on steroids and in real life!
I don't want to ruin it for you…you have got to watch it for yourself. You'll get hooked! Don't say that I didn't warn you. MTV's Are You The One might just be your next favorite reality tv show!
Oh and how does a trip to Hawaii sound? I don't know about you but if I can get a chance to win a free trip to Hawaii by just actively participating in the show's guessing game during the episodes, I'd do it! Be sure to tune in on MTV every Wednesday at 10/9 c.